If you know me well, you know that I love Tennessee football. Setting that aside for the moment, I am now a huge fan of Jacob Karam, the QB at the University of Memphis. Unbeknownst to anyone, Jacob has been volunteering at St. Jude’s Children’s Hospital in Memphis playing music, doing scavenger hunts and the like with kids battling cancer. I am so thankful for men like this- men who have so much going for them but create space in their lives to pour out love on others. As a former cancer patient, I thank you Jacob.
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One of the hardest things about my journey with cancer is that I can’t remember much of what happened. Whether it was from the drugs or the trauma, I simply cannot remember many of the things that happened during the two months I was in the hospital. For example, this morning while at church, we sang a song entitled, I am Satisfied in You. As I sang the song, I was overcome with the realization that the lines I sang were a complete recap of my battle with cancer. It was if someone had been with me everyday, knew my heart and then wrote a song about it.
As I shared this with Sarah she laughed and asked me if I remembered listening to this song in the hospital. Apparently she had heard the song while driving to the hospital one day and played it for me when she got there. I can honestly say that I do not remember that interaction. Nonetheless, the song moved my heart and I want to share it with you. In the midst of brokenness and shattered lives, we need to realize our satisfaction in this life can only come from Christ. May we rejoice in this truth.
I Am Satisfied in You
by Brian Eichelberger
I have lost my appetite
And a flood is welling up behind my eyes
So I eat the tears I cry
And if that were not enough
They know just the words to cut and tear and prod
When they ask me “Whereʼs your God?”
Why are you downcast, oh my soul?
Why so disturbed within me?
I can remember when you showed your face to me
As a deer pants for water, so my soul thirsts for you
And when I survey Your splendor, You so faithfully renew
Like a bed of rest for my fainting flesh
When Iʼm looking at the ground
Itʼs an inbred feedback loop that drags me down
So itʼs time to lift my brow
And remember better days
When I loved to worship you and learn your ways
Singing sweetest songs of praise
Let my sighs give way to songs that sing about your faithfulness
Let my pain reveal your glory as my only real rest
Let my losses show me all I truly have is you
So when Iʼm drowning out at sea
And all your breakers and your waves crash down on me
Iʼll recall your safety scheme
Youʼre the one who made the waves
And your Son went out to suffer in my place
And to show me that Iʼm safe
Why am I down?
Why so disturbed?
I am satisfied in you