With cancer comes suffering and with suffering comes a flood of emotions, experiences and new insights. People ask my wife and I what it’s been like- what lessons we have learned. This is a hard question and difficult to express in just a few words. For now, we still aren’t sure what in the world just happened or what baggage we still carry. We are being intentional to talk it through and to live out our lives with others but still the wounds remain open, festering at times. I suspect they will remain open for a while. I do not say this as a confession. I simply say this as a fact. Wounds take time to heal and we are learning that it’s okay to be broken.
So what do I say when people ask how we’re doing? Should I share about days when I forget that I even had cancer. The days when I feel like I am 33 and not 80? Or, do I share about the days when I have trouble walking because my legs are swollen from blood clots. Or the days when everything is find and dandy and in a moment I am wreaked with sadness. I openly weep and become embarrassed for a moment and then allow myself to grieve for I know it’s good for my soul. What do I say?
This week, one of my close friends sent me this song from singer and songwriter, Tim Timmons. He too has faced the monster of cancer and asked the one question I go back to over and over again, “Is Jesus enough?” The answer I come to over and over again is yes, he is MORE than enough. It sounds cliche but suffering has taught me it is deeply true. I lay before you the same question, is Jesus enough for you?